I Am Much Too Alone in This World

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                                                by Rainer Maria Rilke

I am much too alone in this world, yet not alone

enough

to truly consecrate the hour.

I am much too small in this world, yet not small

enough

to be to you just object and thing,

 dark and smart.

I want my free will and want it accompanying

the path which leads to action;

and wants during times that beg questions,

where something is up,

to be among those in the know,

or else be alone.

I want to mirror your image to its fullest

perfection,

never be blind or too old

 to uphold your weighty wavering reflection.

 I want to unfold.

 Nowehere I wish to stay crooked, bent;

 for there I would be dishonest, untrue.

 I want my conscience to be true before you;

 want to describe myself like a picture I observed

 for a long time, one close up,

 like a new word I learned and embraced,

 like the everyday jug,

 like my mother’s face,

 like a ship that carried me along

 through the deadliest storm.